When you think about going to a therapist, at least on a broad spectrum, the question ‘how does that make you feel?‘ might come up for you at some point. Albeit a little stereotypical, it’s a really powerful question.
Asking yourself how you feel is essentially what happens when you tune in. When you pause and check in with yourself, you see how you’re feeling in the moment—with the goal of responding appropriately and consciously. This question helps you to know how to tune in to your emotions for personal growth.
“How do you feel?” may be the most important question you ask yourself. Knowing how you feel means you can navigate through life, make decisions, set boundaries, and show up authentically.
Your emotions are messages—they tell you what needs to change, what’s working, and what’s not. They reveal when something is for you, and they help you understand your life a little better overall.
The Importance of Tuning In
Tuning in with yourself is one of the most direct ways to understand your experience. Knowing how someone or something makes you feel helps you understand your relationship to it. That kind of self-awareness offers so many benefits when it comes to how you show up and carry yourself at any given time.
It allows you to approach life with confidence and trust that you can figure things out.
With the clarity that comes from understanding your emotions, decisions become a little easier, boundaries become clearer, and authenticity becomes more available.
Why Your Emotions Matter
Your emotions give you important information. They point out what’s helping you grow, what’s holding you back, what needs to evolve, and where your energy is best spent. They tell you when you are in alignment—or when it’s time to pivot.
Your emotions are always valid. But the ability to listen to and understand them comes after you’ve learned to work with them, rather than letting them control you.
Emotional Maturity
Emotional maturity is the ability to feel deeply without being controlled by those feelings. It’s the balance between emotion and awareness—where you can hold your feelings with compassion and consciously choose how you respond.
It means you don’t allow your power to be dictated by your emotions.
You learn to recognize what your emotions are trying to tell you, and that emotions always change. They don’t represent your identity—they represent information.
When feelings come up for you, you can listen to them like you would a small child trying to explain what they’re feeling. Why do we listen so intently when a child is trying to express something? So we can understand—and then act accordingly, doing what’s best for them.
Extend that same care to yourself.
Staying on Course
It’s always good to check in and make sure you’re on the course you want to be on. Like a ship that’s a few degrees off – will end up way off course, emotions help you make sure you’re on the right track.
Think of your feelings as an emotional GPS. They can tell you what direction you’re heading in and guide you toward where you want to go. They show you when you’re in alignment with your boundaries, values, and standards in that moment.
When you feel things like joy, peace, or ease—that’s a sign you’re aligned and moving in the right direction. Feelings that light you up and turn you on are the ones that lead you toward growth and creativity. That’s the universe telling you to keep going.
Emotions like shame, sadness, or overwhelm, on the other hand, are signs that there’s something in your life worth taking a second look at.
I encourage you to check in with yourself often—all the time, even.
When you make a habit of tuning in during moments of calm or neutrality, it becomes much easier to do so when you’re triggered or in crisis.
An Invitation to Feel
When you ask yourself how you feel, you’re directly connecting to your intuition—your inner compass that always knows what’s best for you.
All of the answers you need can often be found in that one question: “How does that make you feel?”—and in the perspectives you explore as you answer it.
Even though it might sound a little stereotypical in the world of self-development, it’s actually one of the most important questions you can ask yourself.
So, I’ll ask you now:
How does that make you feel?
Related Reads:
Emotional Boundaries: How to Create Healthy, Sustainable Connections,
How Gratitude Shapes Your Life,
Your Most Important Relationship: The One You Have With Yourself
Resources If you’d like to learn more about tuning in and listening to your emotions, check out these links:
- Psychology Today: What Emotional Maturity Looks LIke
- Psychology Today: The Magnetic Power of Emotional Maturity
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