When we imagine healing, many of us picture something soft. We might expect lightness, peace, or a specific kind of clarity. Eventually, yes, those things do come. However, in the beginning – and often right in the thick of it – healing can feel like a flood of emotions. It can feel overwhelming and we can sense it in places we didn’t even know we were holding pain. Something that doesn’t get talked about quite as much, is that healing sometimes hurts, too. Sometimes, healing can feel a little confusing. You might find yourself thinking, “Why does this hurt more now? Shouldn’t I feel better? Isn’t healing supposed to help…
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Communication is one of the most important skills you can build. It’s worth improving every single day. Healthy, effective communication promotes self-advocacy, helps you create healthier relationships, avoid miscommunications, and move through life with more clarity and ease. If you are working towards growth and healing, it’s important to be able to name your feelings, so that you can sit with them and learn more about what they are trying to tell you. Of course, this isn’t the only thing that we do, after we know how we feel, how do we as for what we want? Communication isn’t just something that happens with other people, it also happens within…
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For too long, many of us have confused being nice with being good – and being liked with being worthy. We do our best to smile, to be pleasant, and we see that as the baseline for acceptable behavior. As long as the people around us approve of what we’re doing, saying, or even who we are, we assume we’re worthy. We trade our emotional awareness for the perceived approval of others. This way of thinking skips the most important questions:How are you feeling?What do you want? Are you okay? People-pleasing can become so ingrained that we lose sight of our own emotional wellbeing altogether. If you’re a people-pleaser, you…
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Have you ever been in a large group of people – maybe a work happy hour or out Christmas shopping – and suddenly felt your energy shift? Perhaps you started feeling stressed, anxious, or frustrated for no apparent reason. If you identify as an empath, these moments probably happen often. It could be as simple as someone in your vicinity carrying a heavy emotional load, and suddenly, you feel it too. While being an empath allows you to experience life deeply, it’s essential to recognize when you’re picking up other people’s emotions. Read on for more perspective on how to stop absorbing other people’s energy. The Struggles of Being an…
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If there’s one thing that catches my attention almost immediately, it’s when I hear someone talk down to themselves. Whether it’s a friend, a family member, or a colleague, I’ve heard so many people say really harsh things after a simple mistake – things like, “I’m so stupid,” or, “What an idiot.” Every time, my heart sinks a little. I would never say something so cruel to them – and I certainly wouldn’t stand quietly if someone else did. When it comes to building self-esteem, this kind of talk is detrimental to your progress. It makes me wonder: what kind of mindset creates that inner dialogue? What do people say…
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Everyone experiences pain at some point in their life. Whether you’re talking about things like loss, or disappointment, or learning that your best friend really isn’t a friend to you after all – pain from these moments teaches us something. Everyone reacts differently to painful lessons; some folks take it in stride and use that discomfort to create meaningful change in their lives. Others hold on to the pain, and sometimes they take protective measures to ensure they don’t get hurt again. In this post, we’ll discuss the difference between walls, barriers and boundaries. When it comes to protecting ourselves and our emotional wellbeing, many of us instinctively put up defenses.…
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Let’s talk about cultivating courage. Not the movie kind with explosions and last-minute rescues. Not the kind reserved for warriors, ninjas, or people who eat raw onions on purpose. I want to talk about the everyday kind – the courage it takes to simply be human in this world. Courage, at its heart, is not about fearlessness, it’s about showing up even when fear is present. It’s about speaking up, even when your voice shakes. Being courageous is about making a choice that aligns with your values, even when it’s inconvenient. Courage is not the absence of fear; it’s the decision that something else matters more. And you, my dear…
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I’ve talked to a lot of people who would consider themselves ‘people-pleasers’. If you can relate, you might already know that it’s exhausting, lonely and never ending. People-pleasing is deeper than the desire for attention or approval, the desire to people-please is a message that there are parts of you that need to heal. For many of us, constantly tending to other people’s emotions, and keeping tabs on how they feel is a deeply ingrained survival mechanism – something we learned early on in life to stay safe, feel enough, or avoid rejection. More often than not, this pattern stems all the way back to childhood experiences of trauma and emotional…
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People-pleasers are often described as “nice”. Beyond nice, however, people-pleasers are sensitive, emotionally attuned and often deeply empathetic. The problem occurs when empathy becomes your way of survival; when you unconsciously believe that other people’s comfort is more important than your truth – it gradually depletes your self-worth. People-pleasing is a survival strategy, and we do it out of fear – fear of disappointing others, fear of abandonment. Fear that if we don’t make other people happy; we aren’t lovable. The Unseen Burden of Pleasing If you were conditioned to view approval as the same as love, you likely learned that disappointing someone meant you would lose connection. In the…
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Emotions are an essential part of the human experience, in fact, it’s our emotions that make us human. We feel our feelings all throughout the day, but how often do we really take time to understand what we’re feeling and why? Most of us have been conditioned to categorize emotions as “good” or “bad,” but the reality is, emotions are far too complicated and nuanced to use such a binary approach. Moving beyond the “good” vs. “bad” emotional framework allows you to better identify and understand your emotions, and get to know yourself in the process. In this post, we’ll explore how to let go of the judgements you make…
