Have you ever felt uncomfortable receiving a compliment? How about a heartfelt thank you, or praise for something you genuinely deserve? We’ve all been there. Sometimes we receive compliments and don’t know how to react. Other times, getting recognition can feel a little awkward – even when it’s given where it’s due. But have you ever thought about why this is? Why is it so hard to accept a compliment? What would happen if you actually processed these kind words of celebration and allowed them to land? I’ve come a long way in learning about myself – understanding who I am, who I was, and the choices that separate the…
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I was talking with a friend the other day about how easy it is to just sit and scroll on your phone. You open it to check something, and suddenly fifteen minutes, a half hour, or more has gone by. There’s always something vying for our attention. Sometimes, we focus on whichever voice is the loudest, object is the shiniest, or gossip is the juiciest – often without even realizing it. Other times, we might be feeling insecure, anxious, or uncertain. We question ourselves or worry if we did the right thing. For some, this kind of thinking leads to ruminating and spiraling into even more self-doubt. What you focus…
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Attention is the main currency in any situation. When you’re a child, you want your caregivers to look – look at what you did, look at what you found, look at you. As you get older, attention shows up as recognition in school or sports, where suddenly everyone is looking at you. When you are acknowledged in different areas of your life, people “take a look” at your accomplishments, and for a moment, the room’s attention is on you. Of course, things happen whether we are looking at them or not – but our attention to something, often in the form of physically looking, is what gives it weight, meaning,…
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Everyone craves validation. People want to feel like they matter – that they’re important, attractive, successful, and ultimately acceptable to the group. Validation, whether it comes from within or from others, mirrors our emotions and inner world. It helps us know that we’re okay. You can think of validation as emotional feedback. When we’re infants, we look into our caregivers’ eyes for confirmation that we’re safe and that we matter. As we grow, the smile a parent gives us when we seek reassurance, the friend who listens when we need to talk, or the encouragement from a teacher when we’re struggling – all of these are forms of reassurance. They’re…
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I took myself to a solo lunch the other day. As I sat there waiting for my food, I played a little game with myself. In this game, I would observe the people around me, and whenever someone inspired me, I’d create a story for them. I’d decide where they were from, how long they’d lived in the area, what their dreams and aspirations might be, what their concerns might be, and how they were connected to the restaurant I was in. Of course, it was all made up in my head. The point of the exercise was to remind myself that other people have their own thoughts and emotions…
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People want certainty. It’s human to want to label and compartmentalize things in our minds so we can feel safe. If we meet someone new, we might call them a friend. Upon trying a new restaurant, we decide if we like it or not. When we go to a new place, we’ll find ways to describe it in relation to places we’ve been. A lot of times, when we make a new decision or feel a new pull, we tend to rush to define it. Whether we’re taking up a new hobby or meeting a potential partner, it’s easy to want to label and categorize our experience quickly. The thing…
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So many of us feel like we should be going to the gym. Maybe we want to go, maybe we have health goals – but simply getting started can be tough. Our fitness journey, like any other, will have ups and downs. That’s normal. What’s more important is our mindset behind exercise, and the awareness of how we want to show up for ourselves. Personally, I exercise not just for my body, but for my mind – probably 90% of the reason I move my body is for my mental health. Whether it’s yoga, Pilates, lifting weights, swimming, or even walking, movement helps regulate my nervous system, ease anxiety, and…
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Jealousy is a powerful emotion. I think it’s something we all feel, but it’s not something we talk about very much. No one is ever proud to announce that they’re jealous of someone else. After all, jealousy usually stems from a sense of lack and fear, so it also reveals other insecurities. Depending on your level of self-awareness or the image that you maintain, that’s not really a good look. If you’ve ever felt jealous and yucky about it – or perhaps you struggle with jealousy – this post might provide you with a little perspective. What if you could simply choose a new alternative to this seemingly all-consuming emotion?…
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Healing doesn’t only mean you make friends with your shadow side, and it’s more than working through past traumas. There’s even more to it than learning to trust yourself. We all know that healing requires you to walk through some dark nights and accept some hard truths. We also know that there is freedom on the other side of letting go. One thing, however, that I don’t think is discussed as much when it comes to healing, is how much space you create for yourself to feel the good things more fully. So many of us approach our healing journey with the hopes of feeling better, less sad, less focused…
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Everyone wants to feel more confident. We want to speak up, show up, and carry ourselves like we belong – because the reality is, we do. However, if you’ve ever felt like confidence is something other people just have and you somehow missed the memo, this post is for you. Confidence isn’t something you’re born with – it’s something you actively and consciously build for yourself. Like any other emotion, confidence is fluid; it can be high one day and low the next. It’s something you can learn, shape, and choose for yourself at any time. In this post, we’ll discuss how being ready helps build real confidence. One of…
